Thank God for the alcohol haze.

tyleroakley:

Life lessons via emoji.

Except I’ve never had straight sex. haha.

(Source: newkidsonmycock11, via tyleroakley)

Why am I not her player number two?

(Source: ilovewomenido, via dominx13)

cjhatesboredom:

meanwhile in twitter…

moments later…

(via spreadthoselegsohyeah)

(Source: r-milpalabras, via maverick-mind)

(via emilyaych)

acciohealthylifestyleeeee:

I hate recipes that require like 40 weird ass ingredients. I only have eggs, milk, flour and sugar I have no time or money to look for your 3 cups of baby dragons saliva

(Source: delightful-stateofmind, via emilyaych)

lilacid:

niggaqueef:

when you sat in a weird position for a long time and you move and then your foot feels like this

most accurate description of anything accurate ever in the history of accuracy

(via this-is-my-castle-on-a-cloud)

yahh-basically:

he-is-ye:

noodelsop:

*seduces u with my report card*

Ah, the D

Ajdinsgw

(Source: perftag)

(via manga-freecss)

(via manga-freecss)

-everysecond:

I think taylor swift should walk in while kim kardashian is in labor and say “hey kanye i know you’re having a baby and all, but i just wanted to say that beyonce had the best baby of all time”

(via sabcx)

krvsty:

you’re cute but you’re not naked enough

(via legalprey)